Self Love Exercises – Part 6

Posted on August 24, 2012 by flamidwyfe

>>6. Take time to redefine your boundaries. These boundaries may be emotional, physical or mental; they may relate to work, relationships or your health. You might look at these areas of your life & realize that everything is going swimmingly, in which case, great! But you might examine them & see that you’ve got a bit of work to do.

Do you say “yes” when you mean “no”? Do you take on other people’s work or problems as if they are your own? Do you feel that in your relationship, the only person who ever compromises is you? It’s time to put your foot down & stand up for yourself. No one else can do it for you!<<

So this isn’t a problem for me here in China… but I am heading home in 3 weeks and 6 days and one of my previous problems was saying NO. For a couple of months now I’ve been writing out my goals for when I return home and affirmations to continue on the path of wellness… physically and emotionally. One of the things I will have to practice actively and intentionally will be saying NO. I’m a pushover. Always have been and I LOVE helping others, but often it is to the detriment of my well-being… so here’s an upfront notice to my peeps… I’ll be saying NO more often. It’s not because I don’t love you or have “changed” from living overseas, it’s because I must in order to maintain my sanity and be happy with our relationships… I’ll still say YES at times, but mostly when it’s good for me! Just setting healthy boundaries and loving myself… Got it? GREAT! I think it’s going to be awesome to be home 😀

Do you have a hard time saying NO?

Ciao!

Travel – Making Molehills out of Mountains

Posted on August 23, 2012 by flamidwyfe

Well, it’s been a crazy week! I’ve had food poisoning since Sunday night. Not fun. I have 10 minutes to type a quick post before heading to the airport for my flight to Hangzhou…

Positives…
Sometimes your train is delayed so that you meet really cool people like Franci. She’s German, has a masters in psychology and is an art lover. At 27, she’s bright, traveled and a wonderful debater!

Positives…
This morning, while packing up my room, I realized I didn’t want to waste some of the food. Not being allowed to use my cooker, I threw together 4 eggs, leftover sausage, Parmesan chunks and a wee bit of mozzarella. This is the result…

I microwaved the eggs for 1.5 minutes, then added the meat and cheeses for another 1.5 minutes. Yum!

Not sure my tummy will be happy about it, but a girl’s gotta eat!

Hope everyone is having a fantabulous week!

Ciao!

Self Love Exercise – Part 5

Posted on August 22, 2012 by flamidwyfe

From the Feel Good Tribe…

#5 Start making a list of things you really want to do, but are slightly terrified about.

I wrote my Bucket List January 1 and updated it in April. It’s due for an update now, but it also needs a couple things added.

1. Start my diet and fitness business with the intention of it being huge. I have been working on the concept for several months with some wonderful friends, via emails and messaging. Between suggestions from several people close to me, we came up with a name on August 6 at 1212 pm 🙂
Stayed tuned for updates!

2. Successfully home school Sydnie for this school year. Her mom is doing it the first 4 weeks, but I’m involved even from so far away! I will take over the duties when I get home in 4 weeks and I’m super excited!!

I plan on updating my annual Bucket List later this week. Hoping my tummy troubles resolve soon, as I’m on Day 4 and exhausted from it! I’m on a train from Guangzhou to Hong Kong right now on a mandatory visa run, wishing my tummy felt better!

Ciao!

Dukan – One year anniversary

Posted on August 21, 2012 by flamidwyfe

So this isn’t going to be the spectacularly huge post I promised 😦 I’ve had dodgy tummy for 2 days and I’m just not up to it. I think I drank some non-bottle water Sunday night and my normally iron stomach isn’t happy.

I did, however, go out with Rose and Jack yesterday for a spectacular touristy day, despite making a hundred trips to the bathroom! I’ll blog on that later in the week when I’m feeling better, as well.

I typed this up while riding the subway yesterday on the way to the Safari Park Zoo…

Wow! A year! A year since I took control of my life. A year where I changed my
body, my health, my job, moved countries, visited Thailand with friends, met the
most amazing friends in the blogosphere, found out who my true friends were,
learned to deal with resentment and regret, hosted a few expected and unexpected
people in my flat in China, cared for some extraordinary expats during their
pregnancies and birth, and realized finally that I CAN do anything and I’m
AMAZING!

A year where I lost 111 pounds in under 10 months. A year where I learned to run
and improve my yoga. A year where i participated in my first 5K. A year where I
committed to do a triathlon to celebrate my 2nd year of rebirth. A summer where
I’ve maintained that weight loss!

A year of teaching water birth and international standards of care in China,
where at 5 hospitals women now have that option! A year where I decided it was
time to go home. Spend more time with my kids and grandkids, stay connected with
the birth community at home through eduction while developing my next career
move.

A year where I went from this:

To this:

A year with ups and downs and all arounds!

A FANTABULOUS year! Thanks, so much, for sharing the journey with me xoxo

Ciao!

Dukan – I DID DUKAN

Posted on August 19, 2012 by flamidwyfe

365 days ago I wrote this post: I Can Dukan

And decided this:

And I DID 😀

Losing 111 pounds in less than 10 months.

Life IS Good!

Gonna be a big post tomorrow 🙂

Ciao!

Self Love Exercise – Part 4

Posted on August 19, 2012 by flamidwyfe

Print out the best email you’ve ever received. Pin it up somewhere so you’ll see it all the time. Use it as a reminder that you are smart, you are magnificent, you are doing the right thing, & you are doing the best you can.

This is absolutely, hands down, the best email I’ve ever received. Dated January 19, 2009, from Max, one of my babies. He’s 13 now. I keep this email in the inbox so I can see it when I need some encouragement.

“Dear Sandi Thankyou for helping my mom give birth to me. Without you I might not be alive. My arm is doing well but Im not growing at all. That is ok because I am happy and healthy.
I am glad to be alive for a whole decade 🙂

from Max”

Is he an awesome kid or what?

Max was a shoulder dystocia, totally unexpected, as they almost all are. It was the longest 3-4 minutes of my life. He ended up with a brachial plexus injury, which is also not uncommon with a shoulder dystocia. I adore his Momma. She’s a midwife now and amazing with women and children.

Who was your best email ever from?

Self Love Exercise – Part 3

Posted on August 18, 2012 by flamidwyfe

Write down a characteristic for 5 people you admire.

1. Hillary Clinton. I love her for many reasons, but my favorite characteristic is her ability to take a bad situation, deal with it and move on. Whether that is personally, professionally or politically.

2. Gandhi. His thinking was to not end violence with violence, but to solve the problem peacefully, get to the core of the issue. He never compromised on this.

3. Dalai Lama. His belief that all humans are intrinsically kind. To have that kind of faith is amazing!

4. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Bravery and Courage. It took a lot of courage to stand in front of the crowd and deliver his “I Have A Dream” speech and many other speeches in the south. He bravely stated he would fight to the end, and he did. So I would also add honesty!

5. Margaret Sanger. Compassionate. Her compassion for others led her to fight for women’s reproductive rights and the right to birth control for six decades.

Who do you admire? What characteristic do you like the best about that person?

Dukan Update

Posted on August 16, 2012 by flamidwyfe

Been a busy 24 hours and wanted to get a post out before bed.
Weight: 149, bloated and well, more on that later in the post.

I have a wonderful midwifery student with me here in China, Aisha Al Hajjar. Aisha is from the States, but is married to a lovely Saudi man and has 8 kids! I met her in the UAE last year when she came to interview me about water birth at my previous hospital job.

At the end of the day yesterday (433 pm to be precise), my personal assistant came to let us know that there was a lady in labor wanting a normal birth, so upstairs we went to the birth room. First time momma and she had her baby at 533 pm… Nice, quick, fast and an easy delivery. Here’s the little guy a few minutes after I caught him…

Today was packed with working on skills that Aisha needs to do for school and working on a PowerPoint presentation about International Standards of Care. I started my day out with a yummy breakfast…

I am in Consolidation and I’m eating more Paleo like. Still low carb, but added fat. This is pork chunks, onion and garlic powder. Two eggs fried with low fat mozzarella. I cooked it in Macadamia oil… Mmmmm!

I’ve only run twice in the past week. It is very difficult to do in a city of 17 million! Too many people milling about, but I’ve made sure I walk 5K every night. I also haven’t had any yogurt with flaxseed meal (I use that instead of oat bran, zero net carbs, 4g fiber per tsp, same as oat bran but has a nice nutty taste). Anyway, I’ve been a bit ~~bitchy~~ grumpy the last few days, as I’ve been gassy (never gassy on Dukan!!!) and the plumbing isn’t working as per usual. You can’t buy yogurt here in China at the shops and I usually get it in Hong Kong, but I haven’t had the time to go down there.

So today I kind of ~~barked~~ at asked Rose, my amazing personal assistant here in Guangzhou to find me a western grocery store!!! So off I went on the subway to find The Corner’s Deli (yes apostrophe s) in the basement of the Citic building. The kind customer service desk girl pointed the way. Through that door, turn right, go downstairs to BM Street… LOL, BM Street?!? I was sure I heard her wrong… Well, actually…

So off I go, down this quiet stairway and find myself dead end at a Chinese restaurant! I point, I show them the name and address and they take me through the restaurant to an underground shopping mall… It was bizarre! But, tucked around the winding walkway, all the way in the back was a western grocery with FAT FREE GREEK YOGURT!!! And COTTAGE CHEESE!!! AND SALAMI!!!! And MOVIE THEATRE POPCORN, EXTRA BUTTER!!!! Ok, I bought ONE package of that, for my celebration meal on Sunday 🙂 I thought I’d died and gone to heaven… A REAL grocery store!

So I’ve just gotten back from dinner at my favorite Arabic restaurant and dished up a plate of that yogurt with a Splenda and flaxseed… My tummy will be happy again!

And yes, I eat my yogurt with chopsticks… I’m in china 😀

Parting shot… This afternoon I shot a commercial for the hospital to promote water birth. They even recruited one of our nearly due patients! What fun. I decided I wanted to get a shot of one of the camera people…

Exciting life I lead… Ciao!

31 Years

Posted on August 14, 2012 by flamidwyfe

Thirty-one years ago today, I gave birth to my first child. I was a child myself… only 17 years old, a recent high school graduate.

On Friday, August 14, 1981 my dad took me to see my OB, Dr. Larry Holder. It was my due date and I fully expected to have my baby that day… LOL. He told me that most women didn’t have their baby on their due date (it’s statistically around 5%) and that after examining me, he thought it would be Monday or Tuesday, before I delivered. We left the doctor’s office at 1130. My dad dropped me off at my part-time job, a high end chocolate store, where I decorated humongous chocolate chip cookies and chocolate “records” for birthdays and other events. At 230 he came back to get me.

At 400 p.m., after watching General Hospital… LOL, sorry, I haven’t watched soaps in about 10 years, my dad declared me in labor. Labor? I’m not in labor! He told me that for about a half hour I would sit up every 5 minutes and rub my lower back. He called Dr. Holder and said we were coming into the office. <Insert me rolling my eyes at my know it all dad…> We got to the office at 445 and Dr. Holder examined me and I was 6 centimeters dilated! I have no idea how! I truly didn’t feel contractions. I walked the half block to the hospital, my dad not so happy that I was walking, and went to my mom’s office there. She worked in the Cashier’s Office at the hospital and stayed and chatted with her for a bit, then off to the coffee shop for a soda and donut 😀 I truly didn’t think there was any rush.

At around 545 the nurse came looking for me and took me upstairs. Nick was born, direct occiput posterior (face up instead of face down) at 626 p.m. All 7 lbs. 15 ounces of him. The only “pain” I had was the feeling that I was pooping a watermelon out… It was awesome (the lack of pain, not the watermelon part!). My mom, who brags incessantly about this, was the FIRST person to hold him. The doc handed him to my mom! My mom handed me the poloroid camera to take a picture of her holding him moments after birth, it’s pretty funny. I don’t have that picture to upload in this post. After the pic, she handed him right over to me.

Nick and I have been very lucky. Even though I never married Nick’s dad Joe, he always supported him. His family has, as well. Joe and I still have a good relationship. Which is awesome. My mom and dad were awesome in that, until I married the following year, they helped keep a roof over my baby’s head. I worked full-time and paid rent, but I couldn’t have done it without them. And they ADORED my little man 😀

Although I have a lot of fun memories, one of my best is that even when Nick was a bitty baby I would wake up to him smiling at me. I co-slept with my babies (meaning they slept in my bed with me) and even as young as 4 weeks, I would wake up and Nick would be staring at me with a grin on his face. His teachers used to say how precious that smile was… his smile is charming!

So, here’s some pics of my “boy”… he’s a man now… 31. I have NO idea where the time goes… At 48 I don’t feel old enough to have a 31 year old!!!

The day we brought Nick home. With my mom and dad.

Nick with his Pop-Pop and my Pop-Pop.

14 months old

Nick with Jenni 1984

Nick with his cousin Tommy

Nick with his dad and brother.

Me and Nick in Venice, Italy 2009

Nick, Tiffany, Me and Jenni – Jenni’s wedding weekend

Rockin’ the Tiara that his nieces made him wear at Jenni’s wedding reception 2009

Being “Unkie” Nick… with his nephews Shane and hours old Jose.

So, that’s my boy… HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SON… it’s been a wild, wacky and wonderful 31 years!
~Mom

Self Love Exercises – Part 2

Posted on August 13, 2012 by flamidwyfe

This is the second exercise from The Feel Good Tribe:

Think about 5 fantastic attributes you inherited from your parents. If you never knew your parents, or your relationship with them is an unhappy one, who influenced you? Make a list of 5 important things they taught you, that have impacted the way you live your life today.

My mom, dad, me and little sis.

Fantastic attributes inherited from my parents:

1. Unconditional love. I’ve always felt that from both of my parents. I’ve slipped, I’ve fallen, but they both always love(d) me for who I am.

2. Children should be seen AND heard. Some of my fondest moments growing up involved being part of adult conversations about politics, religion and current affairs in the States and the world. My favorite being the times my dad’s friend John Britto would come visit.

3. You can discipline with quiet words. I remember one spanking, just one. I was 6 and rode my bike to the zoo with my 7 yr old friend. My parents disciplined with words… And my mom with a raised eyebrow, LOL. Hearing my dad say he was disappointed was worse than any beating. My parents talked to us.

4. Be involved. My parents were involved in everything, girl scout leader, softball coach, Rainbow Girls, PTA. We stayed busy and we stayed out of trouble!

5. Give to others. We were just barely not poor. You know what I mean. But my parents were givers and this is the most important attribute I inherited from them. If someone needed shelter, they stayed with us. Your kid giving you trouble, they stayed with us. Need a shirt, we found one. My dad’s funeral was attended by many people we didn’t know. People who worked for him in the restaurant and sales business. Customers from those businesses, because he was a giver.

I say this all the time… I thank God for giving me Tom and Nancy for parents 🙂

Ciao!